Motherhood is not graded on a bell curve.  A mother making reckless decisions that lead to her children having even one ACE they could have reasonably prevented should consider herself as failing at motherhood.  Same with the men reading this and fatherhood.  If you raise your children to be ACES 0 your score is a C.  A 2.0 GPA.

If a woman reviews the Adverse Childhood Experiences and think “some of these ACES are very bad, of course, but some are not so bad.”  “How can these ones be bad when they are so common? … a lot of women do them so I am not a bad mom if I do them.”  Wrong. I am going to be blunt.  If someone reads this work and tries to excuse or justify thoughts or actions that contribute to their children having even one ACE score then that person is needs to deeply evaluate themselves, their morality, and their ability to be loving. ACES should be ALRP: As Low as Reasonably Posible. But lack of commitment isn’t reasonable. Lack of emotional intelligence isn’t reasonable.  Women that role model motherhood in the modern area help us define what reasonable is, not feckless women.

Even worse are parents that will take this knowledge, plan on “failing” the course but try and shift the blame to others for their failure. Being a good parent becomes part of some evil chess game to take their children “hostage” to demand ransom.  “Single parenthood is bad: do this or I will divorce you” says this kind of woman as she becomes less agreeable and conscientious and more Abusive and Neglectful every year.  Any hostage taking is an F for that parent.